i nearly solo-ed an entire FYP. you really dont know how draining it is on me. to be pouring through articles after articles. and after awhile, the words just become a swirl of black and white. maybe you dont know how hard it is to flip through the entire file for one quote, tear your hair in frustration as everything doesnt seem to work out. you're tired. but do you know what is exhaustion.

Illusion never changed into something real

some things are never destined to happen. it'll always be a part of my imagination. an illusion.
or will life occasionally give us a second chance? to make the wrongs into rights. to make every ok.

im sorry i really cant give you what you want - trust, love, everything..
something holds me back, im too afraid of getting hurt. but maybe i've hurt myself trying to protect myself.

and it makes me feel worse when i see someone else treating u better than i do. maybe i dont appreciate you enough.

i've always just felt, inadequate, never up to standard, horrible. i just never felt good enough for you.

and there is no one there to tell me otherwise.

i dont want to believe in a future crafted out merely in words and dreams.

anyway. this is MY life. MY dream. MY world. im gonna do it MY way. FTW!


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