what makes you think i ever loved you?

finally woke up. if you can say it, it's time for me to move on.

i'll like it very much if you would just leave me in peace to mope. the 1st week is the hardest week.

being smart is a curse. a curse that you do not realise.

it's too late for you now to realise.

i realised, the moment i am a burden, a liability, a hindrance, no one would value me, trust me, love me anymore. even as my best friend, half an hour of waiting would kill you. maybe, best friends become mere acquaintances after many years. maybe i'm just a driftwood. never a permanent fixture, just a floating accessory.

too many expectations. too little time. i guess it's maybe just me that sucks badly, as a friend.

i have a black pig=) this is before it hit lvl 10 and spewed more rubbish and told me it doesnt love me anymore.
it loves me so=)
one of its least favourite commands-stand. always gets angry when i tell it too. must be too lazy to stand.
a failed iloveyou attempt. bad answer. inadequate answer. BAD PIG.
doesnt like me to call it badboy
like the real pig, its favourite face is the -.-||| face. complete with the sweat drop and . . .

i yearn for time to go backwards and transport me back to my secondary school days.
where things are less confusing.
less painful.
simple.
easy.

was i happy back then? i dont really know. except that affairs of the heart makes life extremely difficult. i just want to go back to a time where such things are unknown.(to me).

i've lost all train of thought, lost my ability to write.

for the remaining of my course, i do not wish to have anything to do with co anymore. not that i don't like it. i'll just prefer to have more time to spend on myself, family, my friends, schoolwork and everyone that i've been neglecting. there's no point in tussling around something that i've simply lost enjoyment for.

i want to do something i've never tried before/never dreamt of trying. it's time to live my life the way i want it.

had enough of the co life. i want MY life. i don't want to be dictated and thrown around like some teddy bear anymore. no longer at your beck and call and manipulation. it's time to let go. i cant wait for my time to let go.


-saw all the rampage of tags on sn's blog. i guess everyone needs to calm down and talk it out. all i can say it, what's done is done. no point blaming anyone for any wrong decisions. i've done what i can. i dont have any regrets. just bear in mind, if we did not meet your expectations, it doesnt mean we are wrong or lousy. new people, new ideas.


on hindsight, im goddamn annoyed cos my mum keeps rubbing in that my neighbour got into smu biz. im already regretting a lot of things thus far. but von's right, i need to look forward. the past cannot be changed, you can only ensure your future's good. dont expect me to stay around for long.im a drifter. never a stay-er